


Criminal Interactions

by DearAnamneses



Series: Triptych [1]
Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, BDSM, Bondage, Canon Disabled Character, Canon LGBTQ Character, Canon LGBTQ Male Character, Canon Queer Character, Canon Queer Relationship, Canon-Typical Violence, Cecil Has A Third Eye, Cecil actually likes Steve, Cecil doesn't like you anymore, Cecil is a hoe, Child Theft, Childbirth, Chronic Illness, Chronic Pain, Cute, Disabled Cecil, Disabled Character, Dom Earl, Dom/sub, Domestic Fluff, Drama, Dysfunctional Family, Egg Laying, Eggpreg, Eldritch Abomination Cecil, F/M, Family Drama, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Flashbacks, Fluff, Franchia, Gen, Hallucinations, I mean so’s Earl, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Torture, Intern Cecil, Intersex Cecil, Kidnapping, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Jewish Character(s), LGBTQ Themes, Light BDSM, Light Bondage, Light Dom/sub, Luftnarp, M/M, Medical Torture, Medical Trauma, Mental Illness, Mpreg, Needles, Other, POV Cecil, POV Cecil (Welcome to Night Vale), POV First Person, Paranoia, Police Brutality, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pre-Canon, Pregnancy, Psychological Torture, Psychological Trauma, Queer Character, Queer Families, Queer Friendly, Queer Themes, Rope Bondage, Rough Sex, Secret Police, Sex, Sheriff’s Secret Police, Sibling Rivalry, Sub Cecil, Svitz, Torture, Trauma, Typical Night Vale Weirdness, Unplanned Pregnancy, Violence, Wheelchairs, Yes you read that right, Young Cecil, but mainly Cecil, no literally child theft, okay time to fuck off now Steve, reeducation, scared Cecil, the Faceless Old Woman is a dick to Cecil sometimes, third eye, well fuck, young Abby
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-08-25
Packaged: 2018-12-07 03:53:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 17,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11615343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DearAnamneses/pseuds/DearAnamneses
Summary: Surviving an internship at Night Vale Community Radio is much harder than the interns suspected; Cecil aspires to become the next host at the station, the successor to Leonard Burton, but between being an NVCR intern, working through the long-standing issues with his sister, Abby, and creating a whole new kind of Sheriff's Secret Police ordeal, he's really not sure if he'll ever get to achieve his dream...





	1. Grad Night

**Author's Note:**

  * For [theatricalartist](https://archiveofourown.org/users/theatricalartist/gifts).



“Hey, Cecil, how’s your internship going?” I knew he meant no harm by it, but, in all honesty, I had been avoiding talking about it—and Earl knew the moment that whimper escaped my lips. “Cecil?”  
I sat there for a while, just staring at the horizon, unmoving, unblinking. It in no way calmed me, but it was all I could do at the time to prevent myself from freaking out.“E-Earl...I… I think I’m going to die.”  
He wrapped his freckle-spotted arms around me and looked me dead in the eyes—I loved those eyes; they were teal, and beautiful. They were calming.  
He blinked and kissed my forehead, just above my third eye. “Because of the internship?”  
I whimpered again, closed my eyes, and nodded.  
“Why?”  
“Haven’t… Earl, the others are dying! There’s been so many accidents! What if the next one is me?!” I was panicking, and I didn’t know how to calm down; as much as I loved Abby—my older sister—it was hard to talk to her about these things, and so Earl was my only solace.  
Unfortunately, I tried to avoid talking about my time interning at Night Vale Community Radio as much as I could—the less I thought about my imminent demise, the better.  
But he was my boyfriend! I should be able to talk to him!  
“I’ve…” he paused, thinking for a moment, and I opened my eyes again to watch him. “Yes, I’ve heard—but I also know you, and you’re good at getting through whatever the town throws your way! Cecil Gershwin Palmer, you’re not going to die.”  
I looked down and Earl pulled me closer. “I’ll keep you safe.”  
“Thank you… I don’t want to die yet…”

\---

I sat in the break room with the others, having a coffee. The foreboding feeling of death having long since settled in for the ride that was interning at NVCR.  
“So…” one of them said quietly. “Who do you think?”  
I shrugged and took a sip of coffee. “It could be any of us; whoever’s the next poor fool that runs on an errand for Mr Burton, I guess.”  
“Yeah, but they asked _who_ , Whitey!” another intern said, and I hissed in his general direction; he was a fairly sturdy guy, with black hair. We were both the longest-surviving interns, at the time.   
He thought he was tough, I suppose—and better than me, since I was still quite small back then.  
“Could be you,” I said flatly, taking another sip of coffee. “Might do us all a favour.”  
“Could be _you_ , and maybe we wouldn’t have such a piss baby around.”  
“Real mature, Brett.” I rolled my eyes, sinking into the chair somewhat and securing my grip on the mug. “Not exactly language fit for a radio host now, is it?”  
He shouted obscenities at me, and the other interns backed up as he grappled the front of my shirt and pulled me up by it—I couldn’t help but laugh when some of my coffee splashed up at him.  
“What in Night Vale is going on in here?” Leonard Burton, the then-current host of NVCR’s daily broadcast, was standing in the doorway to the break room, concern covering his face.  
I stopped laughing immediately.  
“Boys, what are you fighting about?!”  
“Cecil was being a brat!”  
“And I suppose that gives you the right to attack him?” Leonard was obviously far from amused.  
“I…”  
“Put him down, Brett.”  
Begrudgingly, Brett dropped me back into the chair and stalked off. Leonard mentioned something about needing him to go report on something, and he huffed, taking his leave.  
“Cecil, what happened here?”  
“It’s okay, Mr Burton, sir; we were both being rude, but it won’t happen again,” I said quietly, drinking what was left of my coffee.  
Leonard sighed and pinched his nose. “We can’t have you boys fighting so much; I know you’re both passionate about your varying opinions of radio, but if you keep fighting like this, Station Management is going to catch wind of it and it will not be pretty.”  
“I know, sir. Never again.”  
“Thank you, Cecil.” He briskly walked out, presumably because the weather was about to finish.  
The intern that had brought up the topic that started the near-miss of a fight mumbled something to the effect of “maybe it _will_ be him next,” and wandered out.  
If I’m being honest, it was about time.

\---

“I can’t wait to graduate—can you, Cec?”  
“It will be nice to be able to focus more on working at the station.”  
“Always about the radio station with you,” Earl laughed softly and pressed his pretty face into my shoulder, wrapping his arms tighter around my waist; I was laying on my stomach on Earl’s bed, reading Great Expectations, and he thought it was the neatest thing that I was so much shorter than he was, so he’d snuggle up to me whilst I was reading and play with my hair or nuzzle my spine.  
He playfully bit my shoulder blade.  
“ _Early-bird_!” I shrieked and jabbed him in the arm with my elbow. “I’m _reading_!”  
“Ahh, yes, _Great Expectations_ , the most boring book in the world!” Earl was being overdramatic, but he knew it made me laugh. So I closed the book onto my finger and whacked him with it. “ _Not funny, Earl_!”  
“You have read it _so many times_ , Cecil!”  
“So? You’ve read that knot-tying book of yours more times than I can count!”  
“That’s for practise!”  
I laughed and rolled over. “You’re not fooling anyone, Early-bird!” The face he pulled was one of sheer guilt, and all I could do was kiss him.  
“Ewwww, Cec, that’s _gay_!” he protested with a huge grin on his face.  
“What’s that? You want _more_ kisses?” Another was immediately planted on his lips.  
“Cecil, that’s even _gayer_!”  
“Oh, hush, Earl Harlan, you are my _boyfriend_ , of _course_ it’s gay!” And I gave him a third kiss before trying to roll over, not realising that we were so close to the edge of the bed—meaning we toppled down, and I had to nuzzle my face into his neck before we hit our heads together.  
Earl and I laid there together on the floor, laughing for quite some time before I sat up on his chest and nuzzled his nose. “Drinks on grad night?”  
“Drinks on grad night,” he repeated, running his fingers through my hair before kissing me lightly. “I told you, you weren’t gonna die.”  
I playfully kicked his hip with my heel and wrapped my arms around his neck. “I love you, Early.”  
“I love you too, Shorty.”  
“ _Earl_!”  
He had earned another playful whack with my book for that.

\---

Earl softly nibbled my neck as I drained another glass. “Tonight’s been fun, don’t you think, Cecil?”  
I chuckled and turned my head to look into his eyes, smiling sheepishly. “We could—we _should_ make it more fun, Early-bird!”  
Earl kissed my collar, his hands trailing down my shoulders, one more so than the other, so he could take the glass from my hand to place it on the table. “ _Gladly_ , Cec,” he grinned, and pulled me into his arms. “To the bedroom?”  
“I mean, if you want, Early, we could just—”  
He stared at me and blinked. “Cecil Gershwin Palmer, I know I’m good with rope, but I need _something_ to tie you to!”  
Before long, we had made our way into Earl’s room, what little was left of the alcohol still on the dining room table, and within a flash, I was being pinned to the bed from my waist, Earl sitting atop me, caressing my neck with his lips; it was bliss, and I couldn’t help but moan.  
Earl straightened up and grinned at me, his hands trailing down my chest and waist, continuing until they found the hem of my shirt. “Can’t have this getting in the way of that wonderful body of yours, now can we, Cecil?”  
“Uh-uh, I’d hate for you to be disappointed, Early-bird,” I said, shifting my hips, rolling them upward slightly, watching his face closely.  
Earl leaned back down to kiss my lips, pulling my shirt up as he did, ripping it over my head and discarding it as soon as he pulled away. “Much better,” he grinned, moving to kiss down the centre of my chest before pulling his own off, throwing it to the side as he had mine.  
With my hands still free at the time, I trailed them over his chest and shoulders, still intently watching him and moving my hips against him. “What are you going to do to me tonight?”  
“ _Plenty_.” He pulled my hands from his torso, pushing them together into one hand before slamming my wrists against the headboard and biting my jaw. “But I’m going to start by keeping you out of my way.”  
My hands were tied tightly together in a flash, Earl tying the other end of the rope around the headboard carefully, so it wouldn’t slip and let me loose.  
Just to give him grief, I tugged at the bonds, and suddenly Earl’s hand was against my throat, pinching the sides of my jaw just enough to force me to let out a whimper—it hurt, not that I really minded—as he leaned closer to whisper my ear. “Don’t test me, Cecil.”  
“What if I want to?” I said the moment he let go and went back to tying me to the bed, grinning as I wriggled my wrists enough to pull the unfinished knot loose a second time.  
Not even glorifying my actions with a verbal response, he shoved my wrists up against the headboard again, continuing to tie me down, though now with only one hand.  
“It takes a lot of skill to do that one-handed, Early-bird...have I been good for practise?” I pushed my hips up and Earl looked down at me and smiled gently.  
“Very,” he said, moving his hand from my wrists to my face, lightly running his fingers through my hair. “Even when you’re difficult.”  
He pulled me into a kiss, his tongue pushing past my lips to play with mine as I happily returned the gesture, and his hand firmly cupping my jaw.  
I bit his lip when he pulled away, and licked at the blood. “I love you, Early-bird.”  
“I love you too, Cecil,” he said softly, lifting himself up from on top of me for the first time since we made it into the bedroom, knees either side of my hips as he tugged at my pants until they were far enough down that I could wriggle out of them.  
And he did nothing— _said_ nothing, even—but look over my body, as if he’d never seen it before—not in the confused way, but in the endearing, appreciative way. He did this every time, and it was nice.  
However, I was more than ready for some fun, and growing somewhat impatient, so I started squirming to catch his attention, which brought his hands down on my thighs, his grip tight, and a grin across his face. “Is that how it is?”  
“I want you, Earl.”  
Earl lowered himself down onto my thighs, one hand moving up to my hip, the other moving around to brush between my legs.  
“Someone’s excited,” he joked.  
“Hush you!”  
“I don’t think you’re really in a position to be telling _me_ what to do, Cecil.” Earl pushed two fingers inside me, squeezing my hip as I moaned, somewhat louder than intended. “I told you so.”  
He’d gotten so much better since our first time; I don’t think he was expecting what he found then—but he certainly wasn’t unhappy, and we had plenty of fun from then on.  
Abby probably wouldn’t have agreed if she’d known, but what she doesn’t know doesn’t hurt her; only Earl and I needed to know what we were doing. We were happy with that, and intended on keeping it that way—it’s our _private_ life. If we were careful enough, even the Secret Police wouldn’t know.  
He kept going, and I let him, enjoying his touch. “We’re not going to get very far with your pants still on, Earl.”  
“Oh? Why do I need to take them off then, Cecil?” He was teasing me, all because he knew I was too shy to be direct.  
I mumbled at him, barely able to understand what I was saying myself, and turned my face into my arm, blushing, only to have my jaw grabbed by my flame-haired (not literally, thank goodness) boyfriend as he twisted my head back so I was looking at him. “Is that how it is, then?”  
“ _Please_ , Earl.”  
“Please _what_.”  
“Please _me_.”  
He gave me a playfully unimpressed look.  
“Let me please _you_ then?”  
“That’s better.” He kissed me quickly before standing on the bed and taking what was left of his clothes off completely and discarding them with mine; I knew I was grinning, even before he grinned back. I always did; how could I not? He was sexy. He was _big_ . And I wanted _that_ inside me.  
And within moments, it was, and Earl and I were moving together, my legs wrapped around his hips, his hands firmly grappling my waist as he bit my collarbone. I could feel the rope scraping against my skin as Earl pulled me further and further onto him—they were going to mark me, but it’s nothing I couldn’t handle.  
This was _far_ from an uncommon occurrence.  
Both of us had endurance to spare, so we made good use of it; who wouldn't? We were two teenagers that'd been together for quite some time by that stage and knew each other's bodies incredibly well.  
We were _going_ to make each other feel good.

Earl and I moved together, grinding against one another, moaning and sighing with pleasure, the headboard clunking in response to my bound wrists tugging it forward into the mattress before forcing it back up against the wall.  
He was deep inside me, and I could feel every inch of him as he rocked me back and forth, squeezing his hips with my legs to pull him even further. I needed it; I needed _him_.  
As he rammed against me, I clawed at the headboard and shouted as he bit my neck, enjoying every bit of my boyfriend. “More, Early, more!”  
And, of course, he obliged, reaching up to where he'd left my hands and momentarily intertwining our fingers. “I'm glad you're enjoying yourself, Cecil.”  
“I'd enjoy it even more with your lips against mine…”  
“Is that so?”  
“Uh-huh.” I felt my hands slip from against the headboard, though still tied firmly together.  
“Then let’s do that,” Earl grinned, pulling my arms up and over his head as he leaned in and kissed me, our tongues sliding along each other’s teeth, playfully hitting one another as they did so.  
Even after sleeping together so often for so long, Earl never really had developed a consistent speed to go at; he would be fast and rough for a little before turning far more gentle and tender. I enjoyed them both, though getting to scratch up his back whilst he pinned me down and left marks all over me was certainly amongst my favourites, this time being no different than others as I dug my nails into his skin, clawing at him as he took us both further toward coming.

Nothing—not even the radio—brought me as much fun as those nights did. Not for a very long time.


	2. Abby

Abby flung the front door open. “Where _were_ you, Cecil?!”  
“Earl’s.”  
“ _All night_?”  
“Yep.” As much as I loved my older sister, we didn’t really get along very well—and we hadn’t since our mother vanished—so it was mostly few-word conversations. I don’t think either of us really enjoyed it, but it was what it was.  
She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “You could have told me, Cecil.”   
I shrugged and went to my room before crawling into bed so I could sleep in a little longer; I’d had a big night. I wasn’t ready for the day.

“Cecil, get your butt of bed and come have dinner!” Abby called from the other side of my bedroom door, prompting me to groan and roll out of the bed.  
“I'm coming, Abby…”  
“ _Finally_!”  
I pulled on a T-shirt and tiredly stumbled out into the kitchen where Abby was waiting for me, a plate of food waiting for me on the bench.  
“What were you and Earl doing last night that left you so tired?”  
I shrugged. “Nothing.”  
“Cecil, I swear, if you're going about getting yourselves into trouble—”  
I huffed. “It's not like that.” In a poor attempt to diffuse the conversation, I shoved a large forkful of whatever she'd made into my mouth.  
Suffice to say, it didn't work. “Then what _is_ it like? What could you _possibly_ be doing to have you gone all night and then _still_ be sleeping all day?!”  
“Nothing.”  
“Cecil—”  
I threw my fork into the food on my plate and angrily frowned at my sister. “Abbigail, it's nothing!”  
“You wouldn't be doing this if mom was still he—”  
“Don't bring her into this! She's not here and she's not coming back so it doesn't matter if I would or wouldn't do it if she was still here!”  
Immediately, I went to leave, but Abby caught me by the collar. “Cecil, what's this?”  
“On your neck…”  
“I dunno.”  
“Don't lie to me.”  
I shrugged Abby off me and walked away, into my room; she, of course, followed me, and stood there outside.  
“Please tell me this is a joke.”  
“Nope.”  
She hit her head against my door. “Really, Cecil? _Really_?”  
“Yep. So deal with it and leave me alone.”

Abby sighed and I heard her sit down against the door.  
“It’s not like you’re any better…” I mumbled.  
She hit the door with her fist and started yelling at me through it about how _she’s_ an adult, not that I was listening; I just slumped down against it and sighed. I missed the time when we got along, but it was long gone by then.  
We didn’t get along anymore.

_I miss my big sister…_


	3. Mistakes

What was wrong with me? I was such an idiot! I should have known better.

It wasn't even dawn yet, and I was running across town in a panic; what was I going to do? How was I going to deal with this?  
What had I _done_?  
_I can't tell Abby. She’ll be so mad…_ And she would be, which is why I was not going to tell her. Not under any circumstances whatsoever.  
That's when I stopped running and just sat on the ground, starting to cry, pulling my knees to my chest. “I can't fix this…”  
_Get up, you idiot_ , I thought to myself. _You can't be caught out at this time!_  
So I got up and kept running.

“Earl… Earl, please open the door…”  
I’d been standing there for a while and I was fighting the urge to cry—not winning that fight, but I was still trying to—and there hadn’t been a sound from inside. _You’re not coming, are you, Earl?_  
That’s when the door flung open.  
“Cecil, what are you _doing_ out here?! Do you know what time it is?!” He grabbed my arm and went to pull me inside, but then he stopped and stared at me. “What’s wrong, Cec? Did you and Abby have another fight?”  
I gritted my teeth and squeezed my eyes shut, turning my head to the ground.  
“It’s okay, Cec. It’s gonna be okay.” Earl just picked me up and carried me inside, kicking the door shut behind him. I heard it click, locked, behind us and pressed my face into my boyfriend’s chest; I was so tired. I couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore.

\---

I laid there, clinging to the pillows, without moving an inch. I was wrapped up in blankets on a mattress Earl had put on the floor for me, tears having long since stained my face.  
“Cec?”  
Having heard him and actually being able to respond had very quickly become two very different things; I was quiet most of the time now. Afraid. I didn’t know what to do anymore.  
Earl gently wrapped an arm around my waist and laid on the mattress with me, taking care to not move me too much, nor to be too rough with me. “Cec, it’s gonna be okay.”  
“What if it’s not?” I whispered, my voice cracking. “I can’t do this, Earl…”  
“We’ll find a way.” His hold of me got a little more secure as he gently pressed his face into my hair. “Do we know how—”  
“One. Just one…”  
“I could…do that,” Earl mumbled, burying his face further into my hair. “We… Abby doesn’t need to even know.”  
“She’ll know. She always knows.”  
Closing his palm to grab my shirt, Earl sighed. “We’ll work this out.”  
“No, we won’t, Earl… We can’t… Not this.”

\---

Earl had me propped up on pillows as I clinged to the blankets, kneeling in front of me with a plate. “I know you’re afraid, Cecil, but you need to eat.”  
“I…I don’t want to…”  
“You _need_ to, Cec. Please?” he said, gently running his fingers through my hair.  
I sighed and opened my mouth and he picked up the fork and started feeding me.  
“You haven’t been to the station yet, have you?”  
I looked down.  
“Cecil, you can’t just stay inside for however long this takes.”  
“Four months.”  
“That’s my point, Cec!” Earl sighed and put the plate down on the mattress beside us. “The Secret Police will find out…”  
“No…” Tears welled up in my eyes and I threw myself under the blankets, pulling them up and over my head and using them as a cocoon to keep myself safe. I didn’t want to come out; I didn’t want them to find me and get me. I didn’t want to lose what I had—to lose _this_.  
“Oh, Cecil, no!” Earl threw himself over me and held me tightly through the blankets. “We’ll work this out, it’ll be okay. I’m sorry, Cec, I’m sorry… I’ll make sure it’s okay.”  
After some time of comforting from Earl, I eventually poked my head out from under the blanket and he smiled softly at me before kissing my forehead as he always did. “Feeling better?”  
I nodded.  
“Good.” And Earl went back to feeding me before cuddling up beside me, wrapping his arms around my waist. “We’ll make it. I know we will.”  
“I hope so…”  
“I _know_ so,” he said, kissing my temple. “No matter what happens, we will.”  
I smiled slightly for the first time in days.

\---

I stared at the roof, clawing slightly at my shirt, and sighed. Earl was sound asleep next to me, half on and half off the mattress, fluffy red hair all over the place.  
There really wasn't enough room for both of us there on the bed, but Earl insisted he stay with me “just in case”. Personally, I think he was as anxious as I was, not that he'd admit it.  
I turned my head and looked at him before rolling onto my side and twisting strands of fire around my fingers. “I don't think I can do this, Early-bird…” I mumbled, resting my head on his shoulder and looking toward the curtain, slight amounts of light coming through the cracks.   
Soon, my eyes started to close on their own and I was asleep not long after; exhaustion had taken over from terror, and, for a little, I felt nothing, which was better than feeling anything, at the time.

“Cecil, really, going and getting yourself into _this_ much trouble?”  
I jolted up and frantically looked around the room. “W-Who’s there?”  
I could almost hear the eye roll. “It's me, Cecil. The Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives In Your Home—well, this is _Earl’s_ home, not yours, but you are here, so it's all the same to me.”  
I mumbled something to the effect of “oh” and sat up, pulling down my shirt, since it had ridden up in my sleep. “It… It was an accident…”  
“It still happened.”  
I huffed and crossed my arms. “If you're going to be rude, you can just go away!”  
“Are you okay, Cec?” I heard Earl call from another room. “I'm just making breakfast. Do you want me to bring it in for you?”  
I sat and thought for a moment before pushing myself onto my feet and walking out of the makeshift guest room, scowling at the open door before stumbling out into the kitchen. “I…I can manage, I think.”  
Earl looked over his shoulder and smiled at me. “You're up!”  
“I'm… tired…”

I think I passed out.


	4. Serious Decisions

It had been weeks.  
I couldn’t remember the last time I left the room—I don’t think I had at all; Earl brought me coffee and food whilst keeping the door only slightly ajar and the curtains in every room nearby drawn shut. It was too bright otherwise.  
“How are you feeling, Cec?”  
I didn’t respond and just munched on whatever Earl had cooked me, curled up as far as I could be.  
“Cec, we need to talk about this.”  
“Rosalie, or Roger. There’s nothing else to talk about.”  
“ _Cecil, please_.” Earl gently touched my stomach through the blankets and I glared at him. “Please, just talk to me, Cec.”  
Scrunching my nose, I rolled away from him, simultaneously making an attempt at curling up further. I failed. “I don’t want to.”  
The exhausted ginger sighed and lightly lowered his head onto my hip. “I’m sorry, kid, your mom’s really scared and upset, but we’ll all be okay. That’s a promise.”

\---

I pulled my shirt off and looked at the bump in my stomach. “I don’t know how I’m going to deal with this; I can’t raise a _child_! I only just got out of high school!”  
Earl had gone out—I think to get groceries, though I’m a little unsure—and so it was just the Faceless Old Woman and me there. “Are you going to mention this to him, Cecil?”  
“I…” I sighed and sunk into the nest. “Maybe…”  
“Well, _I_ think you should, however it is something only you can do for yourself.”  
“I know…”  
“There’s something else, isn’t there?”  
My throat closed for a moment and I grabbed a fistful of blanket. “W-What makes you think that?”  
The Faceless Old Woman just laughed.  
“Is… Is it that obvious?” If she’d had a face, I’m sure she would have been nodding and rolling her eyes at me just for even _thinking_ about asking that.  
“ _Yes_ , Cecil.”  
I touched one hand to my stomach, my baby’s egg was safely tucked inside. “I love this baby and I want to keep them safe, but… I don’t know if I still… I’m so scared and I don’t know how I feel anymore… I can’t…”

_ I want my big sister... _

\---

“E-Earl…”  
It had been so long since I’d left the room that when he saw me standing in the doorway to the kitchen, he looked somewhat shocked. “Are you alright, Cec, do you need he—”  
“I’m fine, Earl…” I said, looking down and tugging on the edges of my shirt, which was getting too short to cover my stomach. “We…we need to talk.”  
“About what?”  
“About _this_ , Earl!” My voice cracked as I was gesturing up and down my body.  
Earl nodded and turned off the stove before walking to me and taking my hands in his to guide me to the nearest chair, sitting down too once I was comfortable.  
I had been there for the better part of a month by then, and was exhausted from all the stress I’d been under—though, thankfully, both Earl and the Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives In Your Home had been supporting me as best they both could (this mainly came in the form of bringing me blankets and pillows for me to further expand my nest on the mattress)—but I still knew things couldn’t work out with me just hiding in the spare room for the rest of our lives.  
To be frank, I didn’t _want_ to either.  
“So what about all this do you want to talk about, Cec?”  
I looked down and clawed at my legs for a bit before taking a deep breath. “We need to talk about what we’re going to do…and about _us_ , Earl…”  
His expression was on of sheer horror when I looked up.

“I understand, and it’s okay that you need time to sort your head out,” Earl said, smiling as he shoved a forkful of food in his mouth. “I’m always here for you, Cecil, and you’re welcome to stay for as long as you’d like. I’ll take care of everything once you go back home.”  
“Thank you, Earl…” That had gone surprisingly well; I was so confused and afraid that I didn’t know how I felt anymore, and I just needed time—but I didn’t want to try and raise a child alone either.  
So, Earl and I decided that we’d stay close friends, and would work through this together; he was going to take our baby and raise them, since he was far more stable than me and felt he could do that—and he loved our baby already, so he didn’t mind at all.  
I was going to get to see them as often as I wanted, but we didn’t think telling people that I’m their mother was a good idea, although we _also_ knew that it was going to be hard passing it off as if I wasn’t either.  
Earl helped me up from the chair, one arm wrapped around my waist, and I clung to him, as always; even if we weren’t a couple anymore, we’d always been this close. As Josie said, we were joined at the hip when we were younger—even long before we started dating. I closed my eyes and let him guide me back toward my blanket nest, gently dropping me into the pillows.  
There was a knock at the door, and he kissed my forehead and wrapped me up in the loose blankets. “I’ll be right back, Cec. You stay there and rest, okay?”  
I nodded and yawned. “Okay…” We’d managed to talk about everything for so long that I’d worn myself out from panicking.  
“Earl, please, I know Cecil is here. What’s going on?” It was Abby. “He hasn’t been home or at the radio or anywhere in _two months_ , Earl; I know he’s here. Is my little brother okay?”  
I heard Earl sigh. “He’s fine, Abby, but you should go home, before it gets dark.”  
“Please let me see him.”  
“I can’t.”  
“Earl, please! At least tell me what’s going on…” I was surprised at the genuine concern in Abby’s voice; it had been so long since the last time we got along that I figured she just…wouldn’t care if I suddenly disappeared. She spent so much time yelling at me.  
A baby started crying, and I heard Abby gently shushing them. “I… Please ask him to come back home for me. I need to get home and take care of Janice. If he’s still not back, I hope you’re both ready for me to come _drag_ him out and back home, because just leaving like that is not oka—”  
“Just give him time, Abby. He’ll come home when he’s ready.”  
Abby sighed and I heard Earl close the door not long after, then letting out a stressed exhale.

_ I’ll come home soon, Abby. I promise. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to write the first bit of this chapter whilst listening to Google Translate Sings video, I am so sorry if it's made any of this make zero sense at all; I had blurry eyes because I was crying from laughter.  
> I also apologise for all the chapters being so short and with such sort scenes; they will get longer, but I felt that breaking them up how I have than as one large clump worked better—if you disagree, by all means let me know and I will keep that in mind for the future!
> 
> Please let me know if there's any edits I need to make, but for now, I'm going to bed, as it's 12:30AM on a Monday.


	5. A Family

“E-Earl!”   
_ Son of a bitch _ , I thought to myself when he didn’t come after a minute or two. “ _ Earl _ !”   
Still nothing.   
“Earl  _ Harlan _ !” I shouted for the third time; this time, there was noise from elsewhere in the house, though I was hurting too much to care. “Earl fucking Harlan, if you don’t get here right this second, I’ll—”   
Finally, he appeared in the doorway. “Cec, Cec, I’m here, what’s— _ oh _ .” Earl skidded across the floor and into the blanket nest with me, gently moving me so I was leaning against him, wriggling his fingers into mine. “You’ve got this, Cecil. I’ll be here with you the whole time.”   
“It hurts, Early-bird…” Forget how mentally unprepared I was to have a child—I wasn’t finished metamorphosis! Yes, my body could handle an undeveloped egg—I’d been laying them once or twice a year for quite some time—but one I’d been carrying for three months?  _ Absolutely not! _   
I broke down into tears and squeezed Earl’s hand. He gently squeezed mine back and kissed the top of my head. “Together, Cec; we started this together,” he said softly. “We’ll do this together too.”   
Gritting my teeth, I repositioned my legs and nodded. “T-Together…” I started pushing and immediately screamed.  
Remind me never to have drunk sex again…

I was huddled up against the edges of my nest, crying as Earl kneeled in front of me, his hands gently gripping our baby’s egg. “On the count of three?”   
“I—” I yelped. “Three!”   
Taken by surprise, Earl furrowed his brow for a moment before he realised I was pushing again and he began carefully pulling; we’d been at it for hours, and I just wanted it over.   
And suddenly all the pressure was gone; it still hurt, but not nearly as much as it had. “E-Earl, is-is our—”   
“Shhh, they’re fine, Cec,” Earl said, grinning as he looked up at me, slowly moving a somewhat soft egg closer to me. “You did it.”   
I smiled, curling around the light teal egg the moment it was close enough. “H-Hi, baby…”   
Everything went dark.

\---

Having far more energy than I had in quite a while, I bounced happily where I sat, my baby’s egg tucked safely in my arms, as I was babbling to Earl about what Abby had told my about our species’ rituals surrounding new children. “Abby says we’re able to reproduce with any other species, and I didn’t really believe her, but  _ look _ , Earl! Look! That’s our baby in this egg!”   
Earl was smiling alongside me, and I looked up at him, still bouncing, thinking to myself,  _ it was all just the fear. He’s good and I love him and we’ll be a happy family! _   
“So, you said you guys draw on your babies’ eggs once they harden, right?”   
“That’s right!”   
“Can…Can I do that?” he said shyly, softly touching the egg.   
I beamed at him and leaned forward slightly to kiss his chin. “Of  _ course  _ !”   
Earl looked down at me with kind eyes and lightly held my chin. “I love you, Cecil Palmer.” For the first time in months, we kissed, and it felt perfect.   
Earlier than I’d have liked, but perfect nonetheless.   
Tiny vibrations came from inside the egg and we both looked at each other, eyes wide with excitement, grinning from ear to ear. Our baby had just moved!

\---

I curled up with Earl, snuggled under several blankets, around our soon-to-hatch child, staring at him in the dark as he gently rubbed its shell. “Just a month more now, and our baby will be here,” I whispered to him, nuzzling his nose.   
“I told you we’d get through this, didn’t I?”   
I quietly laughed. “Yes, you did, Earl.”   
He kissed the bridge of my nose. “You’re still recovering, Cec, how about you get some rest?”   
I rolled my eyes and pecked his lips before tightening my curl around the egg. “Goodnight, Early-bird. Goodnight, baby.”   
“Goodnight, Cec.” Earl started twirling my hair around his fingers and I know he was watching me as I dozed off. I was okay with that; I felt safe with him watching.

_ I did it, sis… I’ll be home soon. I promise. _

\---

Earl had disappeared sometime in the morning—I was half-asleep, so didn’t really take much notice as he tucked me and the egg in, nor when I heard the front door close.   
I think I fell asleep again, actually.   
It wasn’t until sometime in the afternoon that I started to get worried. Did something happen? Was he hurt? Had he been kidnapped by the Secret Police? I pulled the egg a little closer, wrapping the blankets around us a little tighter, as if that would keep us safe from what was going to happen.   
I blinked—at least, I thought I did—and then suddenly there was Earl kissing my forehead. “Hey, Cec!”   
“You’re home!” I shouted, pulling him into a hug and kissing his cheek. “I was so worried!”   
Earl chuckled and kissed my neck. “I just went out to get some things—for the baby, you know?”   
I smiled and looked at the small mound of stuff Earl had sitting on the floor beside my nest. “You’re going to decorate their egg! Oh, Earl, that’s wonderful!” I shrieked excitedly, and the egg vibrated as if to share emotion. “That’s right, Egg! Your dad’s going to decorate your shell! It’s going to be wonderful, I just know it!”   
Earl laughed and the two of us worked to find a comfortable way for him to do just that; the egg sat in my lap with Earl laying on his stomach and excitedly drawing what he felt was right onto the shell. I played with his hair and occasionally poked his freckled nose, moving the egg when asked.   
By the time it was all done, it was sunset, and for once, the curtain was open for us to see it.   
“Beautiful, isn’t it?”   
“It is…”   
Ear burst out laughing. “I wasn’t talking about their egg, Cec!” He kissed my cheek. “The sunset.”   
“That is too,” I said sheepishly, softly rubbing the egg in my lap. “But I think the egg is even more so, Earl.”   
Earl rolled his eyes and pulled me in for a loving kiss—and the egg vibrated once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thank you to the wonderful [ TheatricalArtist](http://archiveofourown.org/users/theatricalartist) for the design of the Harlan baby's egg!


	6. Eye of the Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for taking so long in writing this chapter! I've been super tired and in a lot of pain the last couple of weeks, so it's been a slow process for finishing off this chapter—but, here it is, so I hope you enjoy it!

I tiredly pressed my face into Earl’s chest, the egg snug between us, and sighed softly.  
It had been around a week, so I had been able to go back home, but I didn't want to leave them; I couldn't possibly take our egg back with me to stay with Abby for the last few weeks, but I didn't want to he away from my little egg...or Earl either.  
“Hey, Cec, I'll be back in just a minute, okay?” Earl whispered, kissing the top of my head. “Keep the baby warm for me.”  
Nodding sleepily, I mumbled something along the lines of “alright”, and started dozing off again, squinting at him for a moment as he got up, my eyes closed again by the time the door clicked shut.  
But they flew open when an ungodly collection of banging and crashing, mixed with Earl shouting, echoed throughout the house.  
I took my little egg and squeezed us both inside the closet, holding my breath and praying for a miracle.  
They had finally come for us.

I don't know how long I stayed there, trying my best to block out Earl’s pained screams; they were hurting him, but there was nothing I could do. I was too small and too weak—even my markings weren't going to be of use—and I couldn't leave our egg alone.  
But then the crashing of every door in the house being opened one-by-one started, and I knew I had no hope anymore—so I gently pushed the egg further into the closet, and curled up as tightly as I could.  
The door flung open and hit the wall, and I held my breath, listening to each footstep as they moved across the room.  
The door was pulled open and immediately after, there was a big hand crushing my ankle, its owner dragging me out from the closet, across the floor, likely intending on giving me friction burns.  
“Hello, girly.”  
“I-I’m a boy…” I stammered, immediately regretting it as I yelped from the kick in the ribs I'd earned.  
They started stepping on my stomach. “ _Someone’s_ laid an egg recently,” they said. “Where is it? Where's the child?”  
I whimpered and they pressed their foot down harder. “I asked you a question, Sessil.”  
Eventually, they gave up getting me to answer and kicked me as they had before. “The child can't be too far. Find it,” they barked to the others.  
I tried to curl up on the floor, but they grabbed me by the shirt and pulled me to my feet. All of them were wearing masks that covered everything, including their eyes; the only thing I could see in the lenses was my own terrified expression, my eyes wide as my body trembled.  
“We will find it,” they spat, before throwing me back to the ground and marching out of the room to throw more doors open.  
Stupidly, I crawled back toward the closet, and started to cry, which brought the obviously squad leader back into the room.  
“It's in here, isn't it?”  
I shook my head.  
“Don't lie to me, pretty boy. What's in the closet, hm?” They grabbed my arm, pulling me up before throwing me behind them—thankfully, onto the mattress—as they opened the other side of the cupboard.  
“I'm really not in the interest of playing games with you all. We just want the child.” Continuing to mumble at me, the squad leader crouched onto the floor and reached into the closet, feeling around for a little until.  
“Oh? What's this?” They rolled my baby’s egg out from where I'd hid it. “We haven't even _hatched_ yet, how intriguing. I could open you right now, and watch you writhe and die—wouldn’t _that_ be a sight for your mother.”  
“You leave them alone!” I shrieked, stumbling as I crawled over to them and reached for my baby, an action which earned myself a smack in the face with a hard-padded elbow.  
“Oh, _shut up_ , Sessil. Do you really think we would go to all this trouble just to kill it?” they said, standing and carefully carrying the egg out. “Bring him.”  
One of the others grabbed my wrist and got me up before pulling me out to where Earl was, beaten and bloodied.  
“C-Cec, are you—no! No! You leave our baby alone!”  
But the leader just shoved the egg into Earl’s lap. They huffed something, though I didn’t catch what they’d said, walking out the front door, the rest following.  
I immediately ran to Earl and our little egg, kissing him panickedly before picking up the egg to inspect it.  
“They…they never leave like that, Cecil…”  
I collapsed to my knees and started sobbing, holding my baby's egg close to my chest. “They're going to take our baby, Earl…” I whispered, and he slid to the floor next to me, wrapping his arms around me and the egg, pressing his face into my hair.  
“I know.”

\---

No longer remembering how long it had been since the Secret Police squad had…done whatever they had—we had no idea at the time, and to be honest, I _still_ don’t quite know what it was about—I wrapped myself up in as many blankets as I could, all of them over my head whilst I cried into the egg.  
They hadn’t moved much since the incident, and I was afraid something had happened to them that day; what if, whether intentional or not, there had been damage caused? What if they wouldn’t make it after they hatched? What if—  
Earl knocked at the door. “Cec?”  
“What if they don’t make it, Earl?”  
He swooped in and wrapped his arms around me without pulling away the blankets. “They’re going to make it, Cec, I know they will. They’ve got a strong mom, who they know loves them and will protect them,” he said, nuzzling my face through the blankets. “You’ll see, Cec.”  
Sniffing, I shook the edge of the blanket off my head and looked at Earl, who smiled softly at me and cupped my cheek to wipe away my tears with his thumb.  
“You need sleep.”  
“No… I need to stay awake for them…”  
“Cecil, please.”  
“No! I need to—”  
There was a crack. I yelped and jumped back from the egg. “Earl, I…I…”  
“Shh, it’s okay, Cec. Look; see?” Gently, he touched a finger to a tiny crack in the shell.  
I felt a wave of calm come over me before being replaced by sheer excitement.  
They were finally hatching.

I sat with Earl, leaning against him as I lightly held the egg in my lap, smiling as I watched it wriggle slightly whilst the baby was moving around to break open their shell. “You can do it, little egg. Your mom and dad are right here with you.”  
Earl softly kissed my shoulder, his hands resting on my upper arms. “I guess now’s the time we see if they're a Roger or a Rosalie,” he said, and I nodded, my eyes remaining focused on the hatching egg as little bits of shell fell off the rest.  
“I have a feeling they're going to be a Roger.”  
Earl laughed softly and rested his head against mine. “I thought you wanted a Rosalie?”  
“I changed my mind,” I said simply, lightly gliding my fingers over the baby’s egg. “You're going to be so strong, little egg. You will be loved forever by us both, and we will fight for you—even if we have to fight the Secret Police, we _will_ fight for you.”  
“We’ll never abandon our baby,” Earl said, moving one hand to hold mine against the egg. “We’ll be with you forever.”  
The egg vibrated a little, the cracks in it pulling apart before a tiny person with white fuzz on their head and beautiful blue eyes fell out onto my lap.  
“You're _definitely_ a Roger,” I grinned picking them up and kissing their tiny nose, which they scrunched up in response. “Early-bird, where’d you put the little blanket?”  
As Earl got up to grab the blanket, I held the newborn child close to me, gently pulling away bits of shell they’d gotten all over them and dropping them with the rest. “Oh, you are so perfect, little egg.”  
They just yawned.

\---

“There’s always a place here for you, Cec, you know that, right?”  
I nodded and smiled, kissing his cheek. “But Abby needs me right now. I knew before I left that she was going to have Janice, and that good for nothing… She needs me, Earl; she’s my sister, and I should be there for her.”  
“I know, and I’m not saying you shouldn’t go back, but after that,” he said. “We’ve got the room for you _and_ Roger to live here.”  
I took Roger from Earl and gently kissed the infant’s forehead. “I’ll come visit you all the time, little egg, I promise. I’m never leaving you behind, but I need to go help aunt Abby with your cousin for a little while.”  
“I love you, Cec.”  
“I love you too, Early-bird.”  
Passing Roger back to Earl I took a deep breath. “Wish me luck.”  
“Good luck, Cec,” Earl said, kissing my lips gently, cradling Roger as carefully as possible whilst he did so. “We’ll be waiting for you here. I’ll take good care of them, but don’t let me do it all alone, okay?”  
I rolled my eyes and headed to the door, turning back to wave at my once-again-boyfriend and our child. “Bye, you two, stay safe.”  
“Bye, mommy!” Earl said enthusiastically, the baby gurgling happily. Things had gotten so much better, and I thought we were finally safe; there hadn’t been a peep from the Secret Police.  
Not until I opened the door.  
“Well, well, well, Sessil, we meet again.”  
The blood drained from my face. “You stay away from us.”  
“That’s not something I can do, I’m afraid. Hand over the child.”  
“Never,” I spat.  
I could _feel_ them rolling their eyes as they sighed at me, “Sessil, do you _span >honestly _ think two barely-adults and a newborn can really fight off the Sheriff’s Secret Police? Are you really that stupid? Or are you just kidding yourself?”  
“You’re not taking my baby.”  
“What part of _you’re surrounded, Mister Palmer_ , do you not understand?” There was a loud crash from the other end of the house, followed by Earl yelling.  
I turned around just to see Roger being ripped from Earl’s arms by another squad member, screaming, and Earl falling to the floor; it all happened so quickly, and I know that, but it felt like an eternity—an eternity that ended with the squad leader grappling me from behind and dragging me outside.  
So I fought. I flailed until I hit something, then threw a few more targeted hits; I didn’t even notice that I’d manage to knock the helmet that masked their face until my elbow collided with their nose.  
But I didn’t look back; after the moment of being stunned, I ran back through the door.  
I was too slow; the squad leader grabbed hold of me again, their blood dripping down the side of my face as they hissed in my ear. “That’s enough of that, _Sessil_. You cannot win this fight.”  
Thrown into what I think was the back of a van, I whimpered and curled up to listen to what was going on outside.  
“Give me that screaming child and get that oaf in with the other one!” they barked, and not long after Earl was thrown in with me, the squad leader walking around to where I could properly see them; their hair was almost as red as the blood streaming down their face. “We run the show here, Mister Palmer. You have no hope of winning against us, so you shouldn’t even try.”  
“I hate you,” I hissed. “I hate all of you—this whole town!”  
“Oh, I’m _so_ scared,” they said sarcastically before a ghastly grin broke out across their face. “Now, it’s time for _you_ to go away to reeducation, and _I_ get to…sort out this little brat of yours.”  
I lurched forward to claw at them, but they grabbed my arm, still holding Roger, who was crying and squirming, securely in the other. “Uh-uh-uh, no you don’t, Sessil,” they smirked before pushing me backward, quickly closing the door.  
It was pitch black inside, and the only sound I could hear was that of an engine starting up. I felt around for Earl, dragging myself closer to him, and then laid down on his chest. “They took our baby, Earl…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh look, it's the asshole that refuses to pronounce Cecil's name right.


	7. Europe

I laid in the bed, staring up at the ceiling, and sighed; I didn't know how long I'd been there, but it had certainly been a while.  
_Let me out of here…_  
The door unlocked and swung open and the light outside partially blinding me, making it hard to see anything but the silhouette of a long-haired person, their hands on their hips.  
I knew they were grinning at me though; it was an evil grin.  
They slammed the door shut behind them and marched toward me, but I still couldn't see; there were too many bright spots in my vision to make out who it was.  
Though, I quickly found out when they ripped the blanket from on top of me and grabbed at my trousers, pulling them and all underneath straight off me, and I kicked at them, screaming, swiping at their general direction, praying for my nails to catch _something_ , to inflict _some_ damage on my attacker.  
And I did manage to, somehow; I clawed at their face, feeling flesh rip under my nails.  
So my attacker hit me hard across the face, and I froze, my breath suddenly stuck in my throat, blinking to try and get the light spots in my vision to go away as I heard a belt being unclasped.  
Then pulled from the loops in their pants.  
An involuntary whimper slipped from my lips, and the blurry figure standing over me laughed menacingly, cracking the belt at me on their hand before continuing to remove the rest on their lower half, pulling me down to the end of the bed by my ankles before slamming the backs of my knees into the footboard.  
I squeezed my eyes shut, because I knew what was coming thereafter.

Buckling their belt again, they smirked at me. “That’s what you get for being a complete waste of space,” they said. “And you had better get used to it too, because otherwise, this is going to be a very, very long stay for you, Mister Palmer.”  
“Please, just leave me alone,” I whispered, curled up against the headboard with my shirt—which was actually Earl’s and I hadn’t stopped wearing since we were taken—pulled over my knees, having shuffled up there whilst my attacker was composing themself again. “I-I…please leave me alone…”  
They cackled and snatched at my ankle, whipping me off the bed. “How about _no_.”  
I shrieked as they dragged me across the floor, naked from the waist down and my shirt threatening to make it completely, throwing open the door and making sure I hit it on my way out; I didn’t know where I was going, but I couldn’t help but start to cry loudly. There was no doubt in my mind that it was going to be bad.  
My attacker’s footsteps echoed menacingly—I think they were wearing thick-heeled boots, by the sound of it—around the bright hallway, the only other sound that could be heard was my choked sobs, or yelps of pain when I was slammed into a wall.  
Another door got thrown open, and I jumped at the loud thud it generated, forcing my eyes to open as I blinked away my tears, trying as hard as I could to focus.  
“This is where naughty citizens go, Mister Palmer,” my attacker said, dropping my ankle and letting it hit the floor before pulling me up by my collar and throwing me into a chair. “Svitz, get your fucking ass in here and deal with this little shit—and fix my face whilst you’re at it! He’s made me bleed _again_!”  
Someone scurried out from behind a wall and rushed over to me, strapping my arms and legs to the chair before moving to the furious long-haired person who had brought me in; their face was bleeding profusely, and I could see just how much skin I had ripped from their face.  
“You’re going to need stitches, Sa—”  
“Don’t call me by name, you _moron_ , just _fix it_!”  
The other nodded and quickly moved to get whatever they needed too, whilst my attacker glared at me. “You’re going to learn what _real_ pain is today.”  
My breath hitched for a moment before I forced the air out of my lungs once again, watching as the person I’m assuming was a doctor started to patch up the long-haired person’s face; there was a deep cut that ran down from just below their eye to their lip. I didn’t think what I’d done was that bad, but apparently it was.  
And, as afraid as I was, I didn’t regret it either.  
They stared at me, stone-faced the entire time; their eyes, however, were full of a white hot rage. I knew I was in for it when the doctor was done. I was going to be punished.  
Sure enough, the moment they were free of the doctor’s careful movements, my attacker lunged for me in the chair, swinging something from around behind it, shoving what felt like gigantic thorns into my arms before punching me clear in the stomach, immediately spinning on their heel and heading toward the door.  
“I’ll be back to take you back to your room, Sessil. Enjoy Europe.”  
The doctor turned around to me and looked at me with dead eyes. “Smile for me, Cecil.”  
“W-Why?”  
“Do as you’re told.”  
“Wh—” I let out a shrill scream that echoed around the room, and presumably even further, as the doctor closed the same thorn-like thing as was on my arms onto my legs.  
“You need to enjoy your trip.”  
Forcing my face to move, I did my best to make a smile.  
But it wasn’t good enough, and a third set of thorns was clamped onto my torso.

\---

I heard the click of the door and quickly wriggled down the bed; I’d long since learnt that things ended worse for me if I waited for them to come over before moving, or if I was still wearing pants when they opened the door.  
Perfection was necessary, though even perfection didn’t stop me from being dragged down the hallway most times just to be clamped into a chair full of metal spikes to be jabbed into me until I did what I was told.  
I laughed as their hands clawed at my body, or they pulled me further onto them, or whatever else it was they decided to do.  
Sometimes, they’d do it when I was in heat, which was relatively simple. But there were others that they’d force me to do much more; they’d make me get on my knees—whether on the bed or on the floor, it changed—and wouldn’t stop until I cried, promptly composing themself before giving me a light—for them, at least—beating and then leaving me alone in the dark room.  
Every time I was in heat, which had to have been around seven or eight times, I laid my eggs as normal—routinely, as I always had before Roger—and a handful of doctors would come in, candle each one, but they were always empty, as I knew they were going to be.  
That seemed to frustrate my frequent visitor.  
This time, they did what they wanted, composed themself as always, and then pulled me up from the bed.

Next thing I knew, I was in a completely different place, wearing entirely different clothes, and the long-haired person—nor anyone else—was anywhere in sight.  
So I walked, and walked, and kept walking. I couldn’t see any signs of anyone else being there; it was quiet, the only noise I could hear was that of my sneakers as I continued along the grey floor, my hand trailing the matching walls.  
It was exhausting, and I was almost certain I had been walking for hours—possibly even all day.  
There had been no sign of people, nor of anywhere I could properly stay and rest.  
Not until I heard chatter someplace not too far away; it was eerie, slightly off-putting chatter, but chatter nonetheless. So I followed.  
I arrived at a wall, where two possible choices greeted me—one, a closed door, and the other an archway that lead into a large room where only one person stood; the chatter was coming from the door, but I decided to go through the archway first. It seemed what was right.  
“Have…” I trailed off and looked down at myself, frowning. My voice was deeper than I remembered it, though I shook my head and dismissed it. “I just came from…from…Svitz, though I’m not sure how I got here, have you got any free beds right now?”  
The person’s eyes narrowed—if in anger or confusion, I do not know—as they looked me up and down before nodding in the direction of another door. As much as I would have liked a verbal answer, I didn’t think it was a good idea to try and force one, so I followed the vague gesture to find a fairly underwhelming room, several bunks jammed together in an unfortunately small space.  
_It’s better than the dark…_ I thought to myself, though not being entirely sure what exactly I _meant_ by that, I frowned, stepping into the room and finding a bunk that didn’t look as slept in as the others, climbing onto it and dropping my sweater there.  
It was cold, the walls and sheets the same grey as the floor, which hadn’t changed since I’d found myself in this strange place; the only thing slightly different was the metal frame of the beds, though even that was only a darker shade of grey.  
The only things _not_ grey in that room were my clothes—which were brown and beige and other such colours—and my skin, which was a dull shade of pink.  
I noticed there was a door close to the ladder of the bed that was slightly ajar, and I could see a bathroom inside, so I went in, and a young man stared back at me in the mirror, his skin the same dull shade of pink as mine, his white hair wispy and overgrown, and his eyes—all three of them—lavender, dark lines underneath them. He was tired, and thin—had he eaten at all lately?  
I blinked as I raised my arm to scratch the back of my head, and when my eyes opened again, I saw the young man in the mirror had done the same.  
I screamed.

Curled up in the corner of the room, I stared at my hands, my nails long, bloodied, sharp. What had happened to me? I didn’t remember anything but the long-haired person in Svitz and laughing with him when he rolled into me, or we rolled out of the shack and into the thorns.  
And the doctor with the deep blue flower on his lapel.  
_That’s not right,_ I thought to myself, frowning, shaking my head. There was no doctor, only myself and my travelling partner—the long-haired person—nobody else. We rolled down the hill and into the thorns, and there were blue flowers there; the flowers made me somewhat dizzy and drowsy, but I would walk back up with my travelling partner and that was that. There was no doctor.  
But who was the long-haired person? Surely, he had to be someone, but who? I don’t remember him from before then, though we _seemed_ to know each other. He—  
_They._  
I shook my head again, frowning even more; he wasn’t here now either, so where was he?  
Suddenly thinking back to the man in the mirror, I whimpered, focusing my eyes back on my nails, though a piece of my hair distracted me for a moment.  
So I pulled it taut with one hand and dragged my sharp nails across it with the other. I kept doing this until I was covered in white hair, even more starting to coat the floor, standing and peeking through the bathroom door to see my reflection; it wasn’t perfect, but it was certainly better.  
I didn’t want to ever see a mirror again though; I didn’t want to suddenly see myself as much older than I was. Much taller. Much different.  
The chatter caught my attention again and I looked in the direction it was coming from to see people through the wall, eating, drinking, talking. I walked out the door to the room, across the next, avoiding looking at the quiet person leaning against the bench, and then made my way through the door where all the chatter was coming from.  
It was a somewhat horrifying sight; everyone, whilst still looking healthier than me, was obviously malnourished, tired, empty. Their skin was varying shades ash-like shades of whatever their tones naturally should have been, and they all had gaping mouths, some with jaws that seemed to have been broken and fixed over and over until they no longer looked like a person’s.  
I continued into the room, looking around until I spotted…something that I thought may be edible, and took it—this place didn’t seem to run on money, and I was grateful for this, having none myself—shoving it into my mouth, gagging slightly at the horrid taste of it.  
But food was food, and I was glad to finally have something.  
“You don’t want that, it tastes horrible,” someone said behind me. A familiar, soft yet somewhat deep voice. “Try this.”  
They handed me something else and, without looking up, I shoved it in my mouth; it wasn’t wonderful, but it was certainly better. “Th-Thank you.”  
“Anytime, Cec.”  
I looked up to see the beautiful face of my boyfriend smiling at me slightly; he had aged too, with dark rings around his eyes, and his freckles mingling into the greyed version of the pink that his skin should have been.  
Tears welled up in my eyes and I hugged him tightly. “Earl, I was so afraid…”  
“It’s gonna be okay, Cec, but we need to keep it down,” he said, leaning to kiss my cheek gently. “The people here are nice, though people come and go all the time, so I don’t know how long we’ll have here—where have you been? What did they do to you?”  
“I’ve been in Svitz, nobody did anything to me, Earl; I’m fine. I must have forgotten to eat more whilst I was backbacking, because—what’s that look for?”  
Earl shook his head. “Nothing, it’s okay. I’m glad you’re alright. Where’s Svitz?”  
“Europe, silly,” I laughed.  
“I’ve… never heard of Svitz.”  
“The receptionist in the hostel didn’t seem to know either. It’s funny.” I shrugged and finished eating whatever it was that Earl had handed me. “So others are friendly?”  
“Yeah, though many don’t speak, and just make noises from their throats, but… you should be fine.”  
I smiled and took Earl’s hand, intertwining our fingers and pulling him toward a table of others who seemed to be chattery, and we sat down and talked for quite some time.  
It wasn’t half-bad there.

\---

I sat in the communal living space—a few old couches and chairs scattered around a table with several decks of cards on it—with Earl, resting my head against his shoulder, having become much taller than I remembered.  
He kissed my cheek.  
We were playing Blackjack with the others—well, _I_ was, anyway—and it was relatively calm; these people were nice, and it was just a peaceful game of Blackjack.  
Until a door that was always closed and locked opened, and someone in a familiar-looking helmet stood there before calling, “Cecil Palmer.”  
I put my cards down and gingerly stood, walking over to them, though Earl caught my hand. “Let me see you off.”  
I nodded and waited for him to get up before continuing on my way to the helmeted person, Earl following behind, stopping a few steps from the door; I turned around and hugged him. “Goodbye, Earl, enjoy the rest of your time in Europe. I’ll see you back home.”  
“Y-You too, Cec,” he said, with a smile that, at the time, I didn’t recognise as forced. “I’ll see you at home.”  
The person at the door pulled at my arm and pushed me out. I looked toward Earl, watching a tear roll down his cheek as he waved.  
I wish I’d realised that torture was coming next. They wanted me to forget again, replacing the reality of what I’d seen, heard, felt, and thought the whole time I had been there.  
They wanted me to forget I had been with Earl again, replace him with someone unknown that I would never recognise, and thus meaning I would never question what happened whilst I had been in ‘Europe’.

\--

I didn’t remember the last time I’d seen the sky, but it was nice, even if the rest of my surroundings were eerily out of place; I loved being able to look up at the stars at night.   
I think I’d brought wine from Luftnarp, with the friendly grey people, though I had no recollection of actually having done that—but so much had happened in Europe, I wasn’t surprised.   
As the darkness of nighttime settled, I laid out on the ground, as I had come to do, wrapping myself up in a blanket and staring up at the sky, watching them twinkle until I drifted off until morning.   
This continued for days, the huge archways of a long out-of-use building crumbling somewhat but still standing tall, towering over me, intertwining with one another, leaning on themselves, others crumbled to the ground long ago.   
There was sand all around, and arches spread as far as I could see—no people. No signs of anyone.   
I kept walking, listening to the warm breeze before laying down at night to watch the stars.


	8. Return

I laid with my eyes turned toward the sky  
But that night was different. I felt something else with me, I could _hear_ its whispers.  
It was haunting me, and I knew it, though I was too tired to really pay any attention at that point.  
By morning though, the unnerving feeling had escalated to panic, and I knew I had to get away; it was whispering to me, talking about a child who I had let down. A child I loved and cared for.  
_Roger._  
At first, my pacing was only slightly faster than it had previously been, wandering around the labyrinth that was this ‘new country’, not-so-urgently looking for a way out, my hands gliding across the arches, but the whispers got louder and louder, and the _thing_ I could feel getting closer. I had to get out, I knew it.  
It was coming for me, whatever it was, and I had to get out.

I stood there, listening to it whispering about the child, flashes of a small, white-haired boy with eyes like mine and hair like mine appearing every time I blinked; he was holding an egg, shaking, hiding.  
He was afraid, like me.  
It was coming for him too, wasn’t it? It _had_ come for him too, hadn’t it?  
I picked up the pace once again and before I knew it, I was sprinting through the archways.  
_I’m coming for you too, Sessil…_ That voice…  
I ran and ran, and I started hearing its many footsteps behind me, its voice getting louder and louder, talking about the child, and how much they were hurting them; I didn’t want to hear it.  
Suddenly, up ahead, the metal archways stopped, and gave out to nothing but sand; oddly familiar sand that I couldn’t help but break out into a sprint towards.  
_Stop running, Sessil,_ the voice hissed. _Do as you are_ ** _told_** _!_  
But I didn’t. I had to get away from it. The beast was trying to break me by telling me about the child and what monstrous things it was doing to them; I wanted to rescue them, take them back to the boy with the egg, but I was alone, and no match for the beast.  
I ran as fast as I could, tears welling up in my eyes as I thought about the child, the name Roger chanting in my head, and so I assumed that was their name.  
The beast was so close, I could feel it, but I couldn’t look back; there was no time.  
I had only a few steps left, and saw that it was quite a drop below. I was going to have to jump.  
Two more steps.  
One step.  
My foot reached the end of the crumbling arches and I launched myself into the air on my last step, a hand or a claw or something of the sort grazed the back of my shirt, but missed me, the beast’s breath furious and heated as I plunged into the sand below.

I don’t know for how long I had been laying, face-down, half of me buried in hot, yellowish grains, my hair covered in them, but I could tell it had been a while. I got up, brushed myself off the best I could, and began to walk.  
Any direction, I didn’t care, I just wanted to see another person’s face. I didn’t want to be alone anymore; there were all these thoughts about a baby called Roger, and the teenage boy in the closet with the egg. The beast, and the hostel, and those damned flowers. None of it made much sense.  
“Abby…” I sobbed before falling to the ground.  
I was never going to make it home. That much was apparent to me now.

\---

I woke up to the sound of a young child crying, and a soft voice shushing them quietly; I felt a warm blanket wrapped around me, and the room smelled familiar and comforting, though I couldn’t pin what it was.  
I yawned and stretched before blinking away the blurred vision to see a young woman, standing over me, her hair white and her eyes a nice aubergine; they were wide eyes, full of concern, but her gaze was stern too.  
It took me a moment to register that she was my _sister_.  
“Abby!” I shouted with a smile and hugged her tightly. “Abby, I missed you.”  
She sighed and hugged me back, squeezing me tighter than she had since we were kids. “Cecil, you’ve been gone for a long time,” she said, pulling back from the hug and looking me over. “When Steve found you, I was so—”  
“Steve?”  
“My…friend. He’s been helping me with Janice while you were away,” she said, and a man, who I assumed was Steve, poked his head around the door and waved with a goofy smile.  
“Hi, kid, your sis has told me all about you! You’re an intern at the station, right?”  
I nodded cautiously.  
“That’s great! I’m sure you do _great_!”  
I couldn’t help but smile; Steve was really nice, and I’m glad he had been helping Abby while I was away.  
A little hand smacked him in the face and he laughed. “Hey there, little girl, feeling better now?” The question was followed by a burst of giggles from Janice. “You wanna come meet your uncle? He’s awake now!”  
More giggling ensued, and Steve carried a girl who couldn’t have been more than four years old into the bedroom and gently sat her on my lap. “Careful, she can be a bit unsteady.”  
Janice pointed at me and laughed. “Unca Cee!!”  
Abby smiled and nodded. “That’s right, that’s your uncle Cecil!”  
It made me so happy to finally get to meet my niece; she was beautiful, like her mother, and I adored her from the moment I saw her.

Over the next few days, I caught up with Abby and got to know Steve, and things were going well.  
Steve was kind, and I knew there was something more other than a general friendship going on between him and my sister, but I didn’t mind—especially not after the last guy—because he was kind and cared about her and Janice. They were really good for each other, in all honesty.  
Sometimes, the Faceless Old Woman came to talk to me, though I didn’t really hear what she said most of the time; I was preoccupied with the confusing, conflicting thoughts that were swimming through my head, as well as the fear of what my life was to become from then on—I had grown, missed years in friends’ and family’s lives, and become a person who was unsure of himself, and who rarely stopped seeing strangers in his mind.

I sat on the windowsill of my bedroom and sighed, looking out to the rest of town.  
“Hey, Cecil, can I come in?” Steve asked.  
“Uh, sure?” I looked toward him as he sat in the chair near me, smiling kindly.  
“Abby’s worried about you, you know.”  
I looked away, shame and guilt washing over me.  
“She’s not mad, but you disappeared for years, without a trace, only to turn up in the middle of the desert,” he said, gently touching my shoulder. “She loves you, Cecil—you’re her brother—but she’s afraid you’re in trouble or hurt. You haven’t left the house since you woke up.”  
I choked on tears I hadn’t realised were flowing, and Steve pulled me into a hug. “You’re family of Abby’s, so you’re family of mine too, and whatever’s going on in that head of yours, we’ll work it out, okay? You’re safe here, this is your home.”  
Admittedly, Abby and I were never very good at comforting each other; even when her ex-boyfriend left her, I was useless and we just fought more, because that’s what siblings with a strained relationship like ours do, I guess. So this was the first proper, not-so-awkward comfort hug I’d had in a while. And it was nice.  
“Are you afraid to go outside?”  
I nodded.  
“Do you want me to come out with you?” Steve wasn’t, by any means, a small guy, so the offer was rather comforting, and I would certainly feel a lot safer with him around. “I could take you to the station and you could talk to Mr. Burton about continuing your internship there, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind!”  
“W-Why? Why would you help me?”  
“Why _wouldn’t_ I? You’re family, I said that.”  
“I… Maybe.”  
Steve smiled his usual goofy smile again before patting me on the back and standing up. “Abby’s just about done cooking, do you want to join us for dinner tonight?”  
I nodded and gingerly followed Steve out.  
As much as I knew I’d grown, I still felt so much younger; I don’t know what it was, but some part of me was still _young_. That Cecil was scared, confused, and very alone, and that’s how I felt all the time.  
Like I had before reeducation.  
_No, that’s not right. You went to_ ** _Europe_** _. Europe, Cecil,_ ** _you went to_** ** _Europe_** _._

“So you’re going back to the station? That’s great!” I knew it was mostly genuine, but part of it was also her being thankful that I was going to at least try and be more myself again.  
I nodded and quietly put food in my mouth to avoid talking, my eyes wandering to Steve feeding Janice some food-like mush, and he looked so happy. _That’s what fathers are like, huh…_  
Subconsciously, I started resting the side of my head on the table, still putting food in my mouth occasionally, and watching Steve with Janice, until I suddenly blurted out a question I never intended to ask. “Are you seeing my sister, Steve?”  
As soon as I realised what I’d said, I was expecting some sort of shocked splutter, but instead, Steve just went, “Yep!”  
“Thank you,” I said, suddenly feeling incredibly tired. “I… think I’m going to bed now. Goodnight.”

\---

“Hey, chum!”  
I hissed in the general direction of Steve, pulling the covers over my head.  
“Come on, brother! I’m keeping my word and we’re going to the station together!”  
I sat bolt upright in bed, gawking at my sister’s partner. “ _Today_?!”  
“Yep! You said you wanted company, so I’ll give you company!”  
Begrudgingly, I got out of bed, scratching my back and rubbing my face on my shoulder. “I’ll be out in a minute, I guess…”  
“I’ll make you some breakfast,” Steve said cheerily, walking out and letting me rummage through my closet for something more reasonable to wear to work rather than trunks and an undershirt.  
Upon realising everything was too small however, I screamed frustratedly and just sat on the floor next to the pile of clothes, glaring at those that remained in my closet.  
“I brought you some clothes that should fit, Cecil.”  
I yelped and turned around to see a shirt, pair of slacks, and a vest folded neatly on top of the mess that was my sheets. “Th-Thank you, Faceless Old Woman.”  
“Couldn’t have you going out in _those_ , could I?” she laughed, and I just scowled, hopping up from the floor and pulling on my new clothes. Of course, they fit perfectly, which was both nice, but also mildly terrifying, because that meant that somehow she’d gotten my new measurements when even I didn’t even know what size I fit into anymore.  
Still, it was welcome, because I didn’t want to try going out in whatever I used to wear—they were all several sizes too small!  
I heard the clatter of a pair of shoes falling onto the floor behind me not long after buttoning up my shirt, said a quick “thank you” to the Faceless Old Woman, and continued dressing myself, pulling the shoes over, taking the bundled socks from inside one of them, and sliding them onto my feet before pulling on the slacks.  
“Breakfast is ready, Cecil!”  
“C-Coming!” It didn’t matter how long it has been since Luftnarp, I was still getting used to my voice being how it was; I still didn’t feel like myself.  
I picked up the belt to thread it through the loops of the slacks, but the buckle rattled, and suddenly I was on the floor screaming, images flooding my mind. Images of a long-haired stranger standing over me, cracking their belt on their hand, grinning at me with cruel eyes.  
Abby was in the room in an instant, scooping me up like a child and hugging me tightly. “Cecil, Cecil, what’s wrong?” she whispered comforting words to me and rocked me gently. “Cecil, it’s okay, you’re home now.”  
I pressed my face into her collar, crying loudly. “It hurts, sis, it hurts…”  
“I know, it’s okay.”  
Eventually, Abby got me up and walked slowly with me until I was seated at the table, gently ruffling my hair. “Hey, maybe instead of going to the station, you two should go get Cecil some new clothes,” she said, taking a plate from Steve and sliding it onto the table in front of me. “I know you love the station, but maybe a little time to adjust to being home again wouldn’t be too bad?”  
“Good idea! We’ll go out and get you some new clothes!” Steve hollered, loud but cheery as always. I don’t know why he felt the need to be so loud, and sometimes it was a bit much, but he was good to my sister and to Janice, and even to me, even though we hadn’t even known each other for a week yet.  
I nodded, feeling somewhat dazed, and started to eat whatever I had been given. “I’ve gotta admit, it’s nice to have a home-cooked meal for once,” I said at some point. “The food in Europe wasn’t all bad, but you can’t beat something cooked from home!”  
Abby smiled and sat down to eat too, and Steve took Janice into his lap, bouncing her on his knee gently, and I found myself staring at her with a grin, which she gladly returned, giggling at me.

“We’re glad to have you home again, brother,” Steve said, walking down the road with me. “I know you two used to fight a lot back then, but Abby loves you, and that’s not something that’s ever going to change.”  
“I… I know.”  
We chatted as we walked to the store, about life, about family, about anything, really; I enjoyed Steve’s company, because he was kind, and no matter how hard I tried to forget it, I hadn’t been shown kindness in a long, long time. “So, are you just staying with us to help Abby out while I’m adjusting to being home? Or have you been living with her for a while?”  
Steve chuckled, “I’ve been living with Abby for about a year now, though I’ve been visiting every day since Janice was very young.”  
“Thank you,” I said.  
“Why?”  
“For being a much better person for her than… the guy before.”  
Steve’s smile faltered for a moment. “I wish I’d been there for her before any of tha—”  
“She wouldn’t though,” I said, stopping and looking at him. “She wouldn’t at all. She loves Janice, and no matter how bad he was to her, she would never go back and change it, because it all lead to her having her.”  
The smile came back and Steve nodded. “You’re right, Cecil. Thanks, brother!”  
I nodded and kept walking, though I was starting to feel rather tired by the time we got there—something I wasn’t used to at all—but I brushed it off as just fatigue from such a long overseas trip.  
Not that there’s anything I could have done anyway; going to a hospital in Night Vale was always more dangerous than just braving through any sort of affliction.  
Though, then again, passing out in the middle of a store and making your sister’s boyfriend carry you and all your new clothes back home isn’t exactly good either.

\---

It started happening more and more, though I decided to brave through it and go back to interning at NVCR anyway, which was going well, even if I would frequently get dizzy spells or extreme weakness; my old passion for radio had been revived, and I was very glad to be back, occasionally speaking fondly, although vaguely, of my trip to Europe.  
But things started getting hard when my mind started aggressively fighting itself over two sets of memories; things conflicted, making it harder and harder to grasp the world around me.  
My health deteriorating only worsened that tenfold.  
Abby gently shook me awake by the shoulder. “Happy birthday, Cecil,” she said, smiling at me. “We have a surprise for you!”  
I frowned tiredly, blinking away the exhaustion from my eyes, and then let my big sister help me out of bed, leaning on her for support my legs could no longer provide me; it hurt to move by myself, and it was taking a toll on all three of us.  
They already had their daughter in a wheelchair, and Abby’s brother was fast headed that way too, by the looks of things. It was never something they would have said, but I knew it was tiring them out to have to help me walk to and from my bed to the table to eat because I could barely stand anymore.  
“Close your eyes,” Abby said, one arm wrapped around my waist whilst the other’s hand was gripped onto my own, which was hanging on her shoulder. “I've got you, just close your eyes. I think you're going to like this!”  
I could hear Steve and Janice laughing together in the other room, their voices hushed, presumably so I couldn't hear.  
Finally, Abby stopped walking. “Okay, you can open them now.”  
I did, and saw that, next to Janice’s tiny wheelchair was a much larger one that the three of them seemed proud of.  
“Happy birthday, Uncle Cecil!!” Janice said, a huge grin on her face. “Do you like it?!”  
“I _love_ it,” I replied, carefully, with Abby and Steve's help, lowering myself into the chair and rolling the wheels forward a little.


	9. Memory

Ever since coming back from Europe, my world had been turned upside down and I didn’t know what to do; Earl was nowhere to be seen, and I couldn’t stop seeing all these weird images in my head.  
A young boy, hair white like mine and Abby’s, and three eyes, all bright and blue. He was crying, alone and afraid. I wanted to find him and take care of him, but even if he was real, I had no way to find him.  
Steve kept talking about the Night Vale government and conspiracy theories and I enjoyed talking about them with him; it was an eerie thought, but definitely intriguing, not to mention it made sense because of the way Night Vale was.  
I spent most of my time either at the station, or with my family—especially my niece; we were the only two in town with wheelchairs, and whilst Janice enjoyed time with kids her own age, she still felt somewhat alone.  
And, to be honest, so did I; interning at NVCR wasn’t hard, but it certainly wasn’t easy when the other interns would speak about me in hushed whispers. I can only think rumours must have spread while I was in Europe, particularly since Earl had vanished as well.  
I wheeled myself into the breakroom and made myself a coffee.  
“Everyone says that something happened between you and Earl Harlan, and that’s why you both disappeared for years without a trace,” someone said from behind me, and I held the mug between my thighs as I wheeled myself over to the other interns.  
“And what does _everyone_ say that thing was?” I hissed, putting the brakes on and starting to sip at my coffee. “Really, I’m _intrigued_.”  
“I-I…”  
Rolling my eyes, I slumped slightly in the chair. “You don’t know and are just trying to get a rise out of m—”  
Another intern, a younger girl who had only recently started, mumbled, “I’ve heard someone saying you two… had… a baby.”  
I frowned. “That’s—”  
_ “Now, it’s time for you to go away to reeducation, and I get to…sort out this little brat of yours,” _ a voice echoed in my head, images of a long-haired person holding a baby, an infant with wispy white hair and the same blue eyes as the child, suddenly appearing in my mind.  
“No!” I screamed throwing my coffee out of my hands and curling up in the chair, squeezing my eyes shut. My whole body was shaking, more and more flashes, little snippets of long-buried memories flooding my head, causing tears to start uncontrollably flowing down my cheeks.  
“What the devil is going on in here?!” I heard Leonard from behind me.  
“I-I don’t know, he just screamed!” the girl said. “We were talking about the rumours and—”  
“Out.”  
“But—”  
“Out. Go back to work, and leave Cecil be,” Leonard repeated harshly, kneeling beside me and gently touching my shoulder. “Cecil, I think you need to go home.”  
“Roger…” I whimpered.

\---

I sat on the windowsill and looked out at the night sky; I hadn’t left the room in days, trying so hard to make sense of all the little pieces of my memory that had come back to me at work, and every waking moment thereafter.  
My dreams were filled with the boy, and his life was getting worse and worse; they were hurting him, and I was always afraid to sleep, because I knew every time I did, what I’d see would be worse than the last night’s ‘dream’.  
“Hey, brother, how are you feeling?” Steve said softly. “Dinner’s ready, if you wanna come out to join us—but we can always just bring it in for you, if that’s what you want.”  
I kept staring out the window, somewhat ignoring my soon-to-be brother-in-law.  
“Janice misses you.”  
With a sigh, I turned around and slowly stepped off the windowsill, staggering toward Steve, who caught me and helped me walk out to the table where the others were. Janice’s eyes lit up the moment she saw me.  
“Uncle Cecil, you’re up!” she said excitedly. “Are you feeling better?”  
I smiled at her and nodded. “A little, thank you; I feel even better seeing you smile.”  
Janice beamed at me, wiggling in her chair.  
Both Steve and Abby helped me into a seat at the table and we started eating together, Steve starting to talk about his conspiracy theories again.  
“Steve,” I said abruptly.  
“What is it, Cecil?”  
“Shut up.”  
Blinking, he frowned at me in confusion. “Why? I thought you enjoyed our—”  
“Not anymore. Please stop.”  
Steve shook his head. “People don't just change their minds like that, brother, what's wrong?” he said, both he and Abby looking concerned, Janice somewhat confused. “Is this related to what's got you hiding in your room?”  
I hissed at him across the table, shoving food into my mouth.  
Abby gawked at me. “ _Cecil_!”  
“He's going to get the Secret Police involved if he keeps going on about it!”  
After debating with Abby for a few minutes, Steve taking Janice out of the room, I pushed myself out of the chair and dragged my body along the ground toward my room, shutting the door behind me and lying against it.  
The tears came again and I couldn't stop them, my body shaking as I started sobbing violently into the floor.  
I think I fell asleep.

_I sat there, shaking, my eyes darting around the lab—at least, I think it was a lab—even though I knew there wouldn't be a thing I could do to get out of there. Nothing was within my very limited reach._  
_The doctor person came back into view, a trolley with bottles and syringes and all manner of other things laid out on it._ __  
_“It will be easier on you if you relax,” he said. “Sam will be here soon, and then we'll get started.”_ __  
_“W-What are you going to do to me?” I squeaked, my eyes widening as I watched him drawing a liquid from one of the bottles into a syringe._ __  
_“Oh, nothing much. We just need to see how effective this is on…you **things**.”_ __  
_The door burst open and the long-haired person that visited me frequently came in and looked me in two of my eyes, slamming their hands on the chair, their face close to mine. “What is wrong with you, you little piece of **shit**?” they growled, moving one hand to my stomach. “What is **this**?”_ __  
_“I-I don't know what you want!”_ __  
_“A **child** , you **freak** ,” they spat, pressing their hand harder against me before launching away, snatching the needle from the doctor. “But you seem incapable of that, so I might as well make you suffer.”_ __  
_And they jammed it into my neck. I felt the needle sink into my skin, and whatever was in the bottles being forced into my system. “Enjoy getting sick, Sessil.”_ __  
_Suddenly, everything changed, and I was no longer strapped to the chair, but watching the little boy—no older than six—in that very spot that I had just been in, struggling, crying, calling out for his mother. I wanted to reach for him, but I couldn't. I wasn't **really** there. I couldn't break him free and scoop him into my arms to carry him out of that horrible place.  
So I just watched, horrified._  
“Roger…” I sobbed.  
“Uncle Cecil?”  
My eyes snapped open and I sat up and scooted away from the door, turning the handle and opening it. “Are you okay, Janice?”  
She looked at me with wide eyes and reached out to touch my face. “Why are you crying, uncle Cecil? Is it because of daddy?”  
I smiled gently at her and pulled myself into my chair. “I… miss a friend. I haven't seen him in a long time, and we were very close. Last night, the things your dad was saying made me think about something that happened to him, and I don't want that to happen to you or your mom and dad.”  
“I hope you get to see your friend again soon, Unca Cec,” Janice said with a smile, seeming content again. “I love you!”  
“I love you too, Janice—you're my favourite niece.”  
I couldn't let them take her away like they took Roger; I didn't want her being put through all that. God knows what they'd do to her, if they did what they did to me, and what I _knew_ they were doing to Roger.  
Steve had to be stopped.

____

So I started shutting him down at every opportunity, making sure _everyone_ knew he was talking nonsense, making sure the Sheriff’s Secret Police would have no reason to abduct him or Abby or Janice.  
Over time, ‘Steve Carlsberg’ became less and less kind until I was always hissing or growling it; he was putting _my niece_ in danger and I wouldn't stand for it.  
“Hey, brother,” Steve said from the other side of the door. “Can we chat?”  
“What do you want, _Steve_?” I hissed.  
He opened the door and came in, closing it behind him, coming over to me. “I don't know what happened to you, but I know it hurt you, and that you're afraid; you always have us, Cecil, we’re your family—you're going to be my brother-in-law, and whatever's bothering you, I'll help you sort out, just please talk to us—”  
I was shaking with rage at his words; how dare he. After everything he says and does that puts _my_ family in danger, he has the audacity to call himself a part of it?  
Without even thinking, I stood up and swung a left hook at his jaw, wincing slightly in pain when the two connected, before my knees buckled under my own weight.  
Likely having heard both the punch and me falling, Abby ran into the room and stared at us. “What happened?!”  
Steve was already picking me up from the floor and carefully moving me into bed, ignoring me swatting at him. “Cecil’s having a tough time right now, Abby,” he said. “But we’re alright.”  
Abby squinted at us slightly until Steve kissed her cheek, prompting her to leave the two of us alone again. Steve closed the door when she did.  
“What happened to make you hate me, Cecil?”  
I scowled and rolled over in bed.  
“Please talk to me, brother. We need to work this out.”  
I hissed at him, baring my many teeth.  
“I'm not going away, and you don't have the strength to hit me again for it,” he went on. “What happened to you—not now, when you were gone, what _happened_ , Cecil?”  
Hissing again, I pulled the sheets over my head.  
“I’m not going until you tell me.”  
I huddled into the wall, keeping the blankets wrapped around me, and then felt the bed dip in slightly when Steve sat down beside me; in the few years we had known each other, he’d demonstrated his stubbornness when something was bothering him, much as he’d demonstrated his love for my family, so I knew I had lost the fight before it had begun.  
That didn't mean I was going to give in though.  
Steve and I stayed there in complete silence, neither one budging from where we were, just waiting for the other to break.  
“Steve, can you come help Janice? I need to start cooking dinner,” Abby called.  
I heard Steve sigh and felt him get up from the bed. “Coming, Abby!”  
I poked my head out from under the sheets and scowled at him.  
“I'm not done with you, brother,” he said. “I'll be back after Janice is in bed.”  
The covers were back over my head the moment I finished hissing at him.

I swung my legs over the edge of the bed, gritting my teeth as I stood, wincing and taking a few shaky steps toward my closet, yanking out a bag and shoving a few things—my glasses, my book, and a change of clothes—into it, staggering over to the window and pushing it open as quietly as I could, but before I started trying to pull myself out, a notepad caught my eye.  
Scavenging for a pen, I scribbled a note to Abby and left it on my bed, sitting on the windowsill and slowly moving my legs around to the other side.  
The door flung open and I felt Steve's arms wrapping around me, pulling me back, so I kicked and screamed, flailing until he lost his grip and dropped me on the floor.  
I tried to crawl back to the window, but Steve just grabbed my arm. “Talk to me, Cecil.”  
I hissed at him, only to notice momentarily that my sister was standing in the doorway to my room. “Cec, we’re worried about you,” she said. “You just suddenly shut everyone out.”  
Having only seen Abby as upset as that once before—when her ex-boyfriend left her after she found out she was carrying his egg—I curled up in a ball, my soul starting to hurt.  
I heard her take a few steps toward me before kneeling down and gently resting her hand on my back. “It's okay, little brother. I'm here, and we’re gonna be fine.”  
A second later, I felt her gently laying on top of me, hands on my upper arms, face in my hair. “Cecil, please talk to us.”  
The tears started pouring out, and I couldn't stop sobbing, so Abby rolled me over and pulled me up, cradling me like a child—albeit a rather _tall_ child.  
Steve moved to shut the window, the frame quietly clicking against the windowsill as Abby whispered to me in hushed words like she used to when we were small.  
“We just wanna help you, Cecil.” Steve's voice was filled with concern.  
Somehow, between shaky sobs and hyperventilation, I managed to splutter, “I-I-I d-don't… want it to hap-pen… to you too.”  
“What's going to happen to us?” Abby gently wiped away my tears.  
“They're… They're going to take you… They'll take you and Janice, and…” I looked over to Steve. “And it's all y-your fault.”  
With slightly more skepticism than I think she intended, Abby attempted to gently ask me why I thought that, but I curled up again, so she just went back to whispering to me.  
At some point, Steve left us be.  
“Hey, Cec?”  
I looked up, sniffling. “Y-Yeah?”  
Abby smiled softly at me. “Think we could get up off the floor? It's starting to hurt my knees.”  
We laughed together for a little before Abby helped me into the bed, laying next to me, her arms wrapped around me tightly. “I don't know what happened to you, but I know they hurt you and I can’t ever forgive them for that, but please don't take it out on Steve,” she said. “I know he's a little quirky and breaks the rules sometimes, but that's just how he is. He would never knowingly put me or Janice or even you in danger, and I can promise you that.”  
I shook my head. “They'll do it to you too…”  
Abby sighed and kissed the side of my head, rubbing my back to try and lull me off to sleep.  
It worked, of course.


End file.
